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06.29/30.03

A Lot Tougher
Than Grady Little

"Without discipline, there's no life at all." - Katharine Hepburn

"Drive on. We'll sweep up the blood later!"
(1907 - 2003)

(Trust me, Ms. Hepburn HATED Grady's managing... it may have killed her.)

Kate may have been the original female dirt dog

Should Grady Have Apologized to McKeon?
8% = yes, 92% = no (wbz-tv4 poll)


Gabe "Boom Boom" Kapler Takes Marlins to School Again

"Very Impressive, Mr. Kapler!"

Welcome back, Your dreams were your ticket out.
Welcome back, To that same old place that you laughed about.
Well, the names have all changed since you hung around,
But those dreams have remained and they've turned around.
Who'dve thought they'd lead ya? (Who'dve thought they'd lead ya?)
Back here where we need ya? (Back here where we need ya?)
Yeah, we tease him a lot, Cuz we've got him on the spot.
Welcome back.
Welcome back, welcome back, welcome back.
Welcome back, welcome back, welcome back.

The Gabe, Walker Run Up
the Score on Marlins

Lyon's Den Locked, Boston 11 Florida 7


Fox Back in the Hunt,
Rudy Awakening Put to Sleep

Seanez designated for assignment, Fox back in bullpen.
And Mendoza throws five shutout innings in single A ball.


NO MERCY
Owner, Players, Nation, Gammons Appalled at The Apologist

John Henry miffed at sorry assed manager. Gammons says players steamed that Little threw them under the bus for busting tail.

"Where are they without this Dirt Dogs group?" - Peter Gammons

"Perhaps too much effort was put forth about communication about the previous night's game." - Grady Little


The Halfway House:
The Good:
Kim Will Close
The Bad: Sox Now 3-1/2 Back
The Ugly: Mendoza to Start Upon Return


Saturday, June 28, 2003

Lyon and Cryin'

Red Sox Nation Saturday Night


The Florida Fiasco
Brandon Blows Big Lead

Sox Don't Run it Up Enough Marlins 10 Sox 9


Grady Lets Up, Sox Lose Out

McKeon Plays Little Like a Fiddle

Grady Took Wind Out Of Sox Sails with Pre-Game Apology, Reprimand. Leaves Wake in Too Long, Takes Timlin Out Too Soon, Doesn't Let Damon Take Base.

Bad Managers Lose Games Like This (Again).
Grady "Sick to his Stomach" after Friday Night's Win. Fans "Throw Up in Mouth" after Tonight's Loss.
Little Calls Out Players, Coaches for "Mistakes"
and "Crossing the Line." (Loser)


Welcome Back

Kaptain Krunch

Gabe Kapler Comes Up Huge in the Big Leagues

"We call them the Dirt Dogs here in Boston because they play so hard, now we'll have to call them the Sweathogs too."
-- Bob Rodgers, NESN Extra Innings with Gabe Kapler


Gabe Sleuth
Kapler Follows Trail from Lowell to Portland to Boston for Night Kap with Four Hits in Debut


06.27.03

THE BIG ONE

Crazy-Arms-Cubbage Runs Kids Out of Real Record Breaker,
But Sox Push Across 14 First

Damon, Walker Lead
28-Hit Parade

Catch of the Day, Sox Squish Fish:
Olde Towne Team 25, Marlins
8

THE BOSTON RED SOX SCORED 10 RUNS TONIGHT BEFORE AN OUT WAS RECORDED, WHICH SETS A MAJOR LEAGUE RECORD. THE PREVIOUS RECORD WAS NINE RUNS BY THE PHILADELPHIA PHILLIES AGAINST THE NEW YORK GIANTS ON AUGUST 13TH, 1948.

BOSTON'S JOHNNY DAMON TIED A MAJOR LEAGUE RECORD WITH THREE HITS IN AN INNING. IT IS ONLY THE SECOND TIME IN MAJOR LEAGUE HISTORY THAT A PLAYER HAS ACCOMPLISHED THE FEAT. BOSTON'S GENE STEVENS WAS THE FIRST PLAYER TO ACHIEVE THE MILESTONE VERSUS DETROIT ON JUNE 18, 1953.


Bench Clearing Stall

Gloves Stay On, But Ortiz Pissed Off


Party's Over

Pray for Marlin Pitcher Kevin Olsen. Hit in Head by Line Drive.

(In Good Condition at Beth Israel)


06.26.03

Tigers Would

If They Could, But They Can't Take the Heat, Get Swept Out of Fenway Kitchen

Pedro was Hot and Bothered, Sox Make Hay While the Sun Shines, Sweep Detroit 6-4

(Tigers trapped in Lyon's Den at End)


It's Not the Heat, It's the Stupidity

Fans continue to ride the Grady train out of town for every minor move.
Reason #213: Not having Embree ready in time today.


06.25.03

Detroit Breakdown

Motor City Shakedown

Sox Shift into Overdrive in 8th,
Beat Up on D-team Again
11-2

(yeah, Burkett was fine)


06.24.03

All Systems Lowe

Derek is Back


Manny, Millar, and Nomar Firing
on All Cylinders Against Detroit

Red Sox 10 Tigers 1


Playing Possum?
The Return of Fossum

"We'll see where we're at at the time (of his return), we'll probably have him go into the bullpen first but we'll see where the team is at when he returns, he will probably do a rehab assignment, he's going to take it easy the next couple of days, then start throwing..."
- Theo Epstein, pre-game show


Sox Sign The Gabe

"Welcome Back" to the Big Leagues

My son signed right-handed outfielder Gabe Kapler to a minor league deal. Kapler was batting only .224 with no home runs and four RBI in 39 games for Colorado before being sent down to Portland. - Epstein's Mother


06.23.03

Millar Time is Right for a
Little Home Cookin'

There's No (Still in Third) Place Like Home

Timlin tightrope, Boston 3 Detroit 1


Oh Thunder Road

"What Happened in Philadelphia,
Stays in Philadelphia"

- Theo Epstein 6.23.03


Sox Barely Get By Tigers

Wake Wins, Joins
Walking Wounded


Little: Margin for Error

"Before a pitch is thrown there aren't many people who know what to do," Little said. "After the fact there are a whole lot of people who know what to do."
(Which group are you in Skip?)

Guess Again Grady

Umm, sorry Skip, but most of the Nation was nervous about Timlin facing Thome before the inning even started, never mind before the pitch was thrown.
All you had to do was look at the numbers too.


06.22.03

Philly Fiasco

Sox Get F for Effort

Phils Win, Third Place, Horror Show

Five Nothing

Sox Quit Early After Saturday Nightmare, Quick At-Bats Make for Slow Ride Home


Theo Reads Grady the Riot Act

GM Pissed About Mismanaged Game

"This is way too reminiscent of last season."

Grady faced the music this morning with Theo, Millar, then Pedro on Needless Loss Yesterday. Little Gets Ornery with Writers on Day-Late Relief Decision Questions.


06.21.03

Embree Oh!
The Genius Lets Timlin Pitch to Thome

Thome vs RHP: 385 .556 .941 OPS

Thome vs. LHP: 337 .312 .649 OPS

Thome is 0-6 with 5 strikeouts vs. Embree

Thome was 3-6 vs. Timlin before the home run

"How can you go into this series not knowing that your best reliever is death on their best hitter?

With six outs to get in a one-run game, and Thome the 3rd guy due up, how is it not a foregone conclusion that Embree faces Thome?

Bobby Abreu had faced Alan Embree 14 times in his career and had . . 1 single.

The managerial challenge here is whether to start the inning with Embree, with Lyon for two batters, or with Timlin for two batters (probably the best choice). That Embree is going to face Thome, Byrd, and Abreu is an absolute given.

Complete incompetence."   - Eric Van, SoSH, Gump on The Hot Seat


Little Watch is On, Big Time

Same Old Song and Dance

"We've seen games like these before, where we've come back, and sometimes we haven't. But that was one of the toughest losses I've seen. We had a lot of chances, but we had a lot of chances early. Our bullpen made some bad pitches to the wrong people at the wrong time. But this team won't get demoralized. If it did, it would have happened before now. There's too much character in that locker room to get down and get demoralized."


06 21 03

PIG PEN FAILS AGAIN, AND AGAIN, AND AGAIN

Another Rudy Awakening?
A Philly Pratt Party

It Was a No-Brainer Byrd Brain: Grady Would Rather Pitch to Jim Thome than Marlon Byrd

Sox Tied with Toronto, .500 in May and June Phillies 6 Sox 5

"Our situational pitching was horrible all day. We can't be throwing fastballs to Jim Thome when you have Pat Burrell and Myron Byrd coming up. It cannot happen. And our situational hitting was awful. With runners on base we're swinging at changeups in the dirt." - Theo Epstein on Sunday pregame


Shiell Can't Seal Deal, Unreal

Thome, Thome, Thome Does it Again

(Hey Grady, Did You Know Jim's a Lifelong Serial Sox Killer?)


The First Day of Bummer

Pedro in No Win Situation

Ace great (while he lasted)


Walkeriffic: Todd Goes Yard

Nomar Gets Six Hits,
Manny Goes 0-7, 10 LOB

www.adultADD.com


Grady "On Baseball" Goes Offline

"A lot of people know what to do after the pitch, but not very many who would know what to do before. There's a lot of people who think they can do this job better than Grady Little, but not many would want to be operating under this glass bubble that we're operating under."


06.20.03

Armando Benitez Serves One Up to Giambi

Why We Can't Get Players Like That


Bitter Rivals Red Sox/Phillies Rained Out Tonight


06.19.03

A Perfect 10

Damon Delivers in Extra Inning, Chicago Stuck in the Lyon's Den, Red Sox Win, Split for Philly

Johnny Be Good

 Boston 4 Chicago 3


Trot Comes Through with Bases Full

Sox Got Off on Wright Foot, But Nomar's Arm Left Them Tied


Larry Doby, Rest in Peace


Nomar Testy, Negative

"They (fans) don't believe in us, they all think we're just a bunch of spoiled millionaires who are all juiced up on steroids."


06.18.03

Dog Comes Back
to Bite Sox Again

See You in September Buddy. Bring the Crying Towel.

Would you take Dauber over Giambi and keep the change?


Separated at Dirt

Dauber Labeled a Bad Dog, Had to be Split from Trot. Brian Holds Back the Tears Talking About Boston.

"Those were the best four years of my life... it's going to tough going back...
I think I got a bug in my eye"

Daubach said he heard that he was a bad influence on Trot Nixon, who is off to his best start. Nixon's average, .304, has never been this high at this point in any of his five full seasons with the Red Sox. "They got rid of me, so he should be able to relax now," Daubach said. "That's what I hear - because I'm not around. Supposedly that's why they got rid of me. They wanted to split us up."


Rudy Awakening for Seanez, Sox

"Get 'em Tomorrow" Grady Gives Up Again,
Skip Makes Wrong Move with Pen,
Chicago 3 Boston 1

Grady on Seanez: "He probably would have been fine if he didn't walk that leadoff hitter."

Wakefield: "I wanted to go another inning."


Chicagoin' Nowhere

Boston Bats Sleep at Night.
Loaiza Zips Through Lame Lineup.

Old Dog, New Tricks: Dauber Does it Again.
Dirt Dog Gets Game Winner.

Yankees Win, The Yankees Win. Go Ahead by 1-1/2 Games.


Separated at Dirt

Dauber Holds Back the Tears Talking About Boston

"Those were the best four years of my life... it's going to tough going back"

Daubach said he heard that he was a bad influence on Trot Nixon, who is off to his best start. Nixon's average, .304, has never been this high at this point in any of his five full seasons with the Red Sox. "They got rid of me, so he should be able to relax now," Daubach said. "That's what I hear - because I'm not around. Supposedly that's why they got rid of me. They wanted to split us up."


06.17.03

Burkettaboutit

Reports of His Demise We're Greatly Exaggerated

GONE JOHN COMES UP LARGE,
IT'S NOT HOW HE STARTS,
IT'S HOW HE FINISHED

(No, he wasn't doctoring the ball, but he
was just what the doctor ordered)

Fans Try to Push Him Out, But He Keeps Pulling Himself Back In

SoSH Apologizes to "The Napkin"

No Guru No Method: "I offer a complete and utter retraction. The imputation was totally without basis in fact, was in no way fair comment, and was motivated purely by malice, and I deeply regret any distress that my remarks may have caused you, or your family, and I hereby undertake not to repeat such a slander at any time in the future.

- or until the next time you give up four doubles in a row.

Sox Squeeze Out a Couple More,
Chicago Trapped in Lyon's Den

Red 7 White 4, Nixon, Dauber Go Deep

John Makes it a Double (x4), Stirred But Not Shaken: Retires 18 Straight, 9Ks


Right on the Manny Again

June Bug Hits 3-Run Bomb


Food for Thought


06.16.03

Lard-Ass Goes On Letterman

You don't have to tell us Mr. 40-39, we watched you mail-it-in here for four years at 250lbs. (On second thought, was Grady the manager back then too??)


Ryan Sandbag

Sox Get Greedy, Home Run by Crede,
No Win for Petey

Recipe for Disaster

Rupe Roped into Relief on 105 Pitch/Two Days Rest

Tek: "I tip my cap to him for just taking the ball after
just starting the other day."

Get John Gone

Burkett won't be a team player and go into relief role.
Would rather retire if he can't start. He could have followed Pedro again with Wake going tonight. Now he pitches today.

Did Grady Make the Wrong Call on Ryan?

Flashback Closes it Out, Chicago 4 Boston 2

Sox Fall One Full Game Behind Yankees


"There are going to be days when these bats are going to go cold. Pitching is a constant. Defense is a constant." - The Baseball Wisdom of Michael Smith


06.15.03

Nomah is Bettah

Offensively Continues to Dominate


Hug and Bliss

Grand Father's Day

Sox are Right on the Manny,
Big Daddy Ramirez Gets a Game Winner

Great for Eight:
Committee Brings Relief

Grady Gets in the Game and Gets Tossed Over Second Bad Call.

Boston is Broomtown, Stars Super, Sox Sweep in Late Show

Extra Winnings: Sox 3 Astros 2 in 14


Mission Kimpossible 3
Sweep Dreams in Boston


Looks Who's (Not) Talking, Part 37

Shhhhhhhhh... but Pedro, who came into camp talking (about his extension) then talking for Manny, then not talking (after extension ink dry), then talking off the record only, then talking a little bit, then "never talking for the rest of his Red Sox career," then miming and mumbling re: his injury, then suddenly TALKING ABOUT SAMMY AND PEDRO'S PERSECUTION IN AMERICA, then talking after his mini-start, but then "back to normal, no more talking for the rest of the season"... was talking again last night:

"Let's put it this way: There can only be one Roger. That's the only one you're going to see. You're not going to see anyone else (like Clemens), so don't compare me to him. I don't belong in that category yet. I grew up watching Roger pitch. He was the talk of the town in the Dominican. People talked about Roger Clemens and Nolan Ryan and Bret Saberhagen and Dwight Gooden. Those were the names you heard. Roger is the full package. He is what you want in a perfect pitcher. He's got the stuff, he's got the demeanor and he's got the body. He's got everything. I don't know. I want to answer that, but I don't think (I will win 300 games). If I do (pitch long enough), I don't know what kind of games are ahead of me. Amazing? It's incredible. Four thousand strikeouts. Three hundred wins. I was thinking they should rename the Cy Young Award the Cy Clemens. The Rocket Award.'' 
Mazz: Pedro's a real Rocket booster


06.14.03

Sox Kick Astros

'Tiz, Trot, and Damon Lead the Charge, Boston 8 Houston 4

D-Lowe was Home Sweet Home.

Flash in the Fan:

 Remy, Orsillo See a Pair of Monsters on the Wall


"Fred-dy... Fred-dy..."
Fans Go Sanchez Crazy

"I love the Red Sox fans, this was the
most electrifying day of my life."


6.13.03

Get On Board the
New Ryan's Express

The Rupe Was On Fire in the Rain, Damon HR Puts Sox on Top 4-3

(yes, the bullpen held the line too)


Rocket is The Man

And I think it's gonna be a long long time
Till touch down brings me round again to find
I'm not the man they think I am at home
Oh no no no I'm the Rocket Man
Rocket Man burning out his fuse up here alone

Give Patches His Props,
Getting 300 Was Rocket Science


6.12.03

Tomase Says No Nose-to-Nose with Grady.
Bill 'Jayson Blair' Burt Got it Wrong. But Stop the Presses, 'EEI Moles Say Burt Got it Right, Tomase and Grady Got in a Fight!

There wasn't, or was, an "expletive-filled" in-your-face tirade from Grady Little at John Tomase after hearing about the "Grading Grady" column Thursday. Bill Burt's account denied by Tomase. But Big Show moles say it's true.

Grady Not Making The Grade


Mendoza Gets Hellenic 'Shoo!'

Joins Fossum and Person in DL Club

 


Thursday, the 13th Menblowza Lives!

Who Knew Ramiro Would Give Up a Game Losing Three-Run Homer? Who But R.S. Nation.

Extra Innings Extravaganza, St. Louis 8 Boston 7


Little Moves are Big Mistakes

Wake Up 'Skip'
Tim Came Out Too Soon, Ortiz Gets Wrong Night Off,
Nixon Wasn't the One, Mendoza Pitches to Edmonds,
Mueller Doesn't Take 3-1 on Yan Mon?

Grady's Got Some 'Splainin To Do

Jerry Remy: "There's gonna be some questions after this one."

Bob Rodgers: "At some point you've got to manage with a little more understanding of the situation."

Gasoline Alley Goes on One Too Many Arson Sprees

Embree, Lyon Give it Up Again, Mendoza Can't Hold the Line, Nixon Was Off With Runners On

Garciaparra Giveth, But His Pen Pals Taketh Away


6.11.03

PedrOK

The fragile flamethrower woke up fine after last night's performance, played long-toss, and declared himself ready to start in Chicago on Monday night with a 75 pitch limit. Go Team!


Scammin' Sammy Gets a Game Off Sentence

"Of course he knew what he was doing." - Larry Lucchino


Mini-Me

Pedro is Old Self in Short Stint

"I'd like to get a quality start in the next time out but that's up to Grady and the trainers."

 Sox Rule Cardinals 13-1

Burkett Elimination Party on Hold


Shea Won't Go Away

Shea on the trade notice: "I heard from you guys (from his website) at...what was it, about 1pm. You guys basically told me that it looked as if I was being sent to Arizona for Kim and that it was waiting for approval. I don't see what the big deal is, I mean it was true so it's just unfortunate I didn’t hear from the Sox till 6:30."

How is getting to play with Carlos Baerga again?

Shea: "Fun. You know the guys love him over here. Some guys were intimidated by him in Boston...didn’t like his demeanor...didn’t like the way he went about his business. Here in Arizona it's 100% support for him... it's just a great atmosphere in the club house."

How does it feel to know that you are now the man at third base and you don't have to juggle different positions like in Boston?

Shea: "Yeah it makes it more comfortable. Going to the park knowing what your gonna do that night. Knowing that you are welcome. Knowing that you are wanted."


Country Slaughter

After Big Second, Sox Back in First


DL Club Adds Another Person

The Red Sox placed left-hander Casey Fossum and righthander Robert Person on the 15-day disabled list and recalled right-hander Jason Shiell from Class AAA Pawtucket of the International League.

Fossum went on the DL retroactive to Sunday with tendinitis in his right shoulder. He is 4-4 with a 5.76 ERA in 12 starts this season.

Person is bothered by right hip inflammation and also went on the DL retroactive to Sunday. he has no record and a 7.71 ERA in seven relief appearances this season.

Shiell was with the Red Sox earlier this year and 1-0 with a 4.11 ERA in nine relief appearances after his contract was purchased on April 16. Shiell will be optioned back to Pawtucket tomorrow to make room for starter Ryan Rupe.


6.10.03

"No Soup For You"

The Last Supper: Pedro the Talk Soup Nazi Won't Speak to Fans After Tonight's Talk

(unless a fellow Dominican gets caught cheating, then
he'll soap box about his personal persecution in America again)

It's a black and white matter for Martinez ''two innings,
forty or fifty pitches. That's all... After (tonight),
no more talking again, back to normal.''

As a senior Red Sox official said a few weeks ago,
"Judging by his behavior, he's acting like a person who
doesn't want to be here." (Herald, Bryant, 6.9.03)


Sox House of Cards Collapses Again and Walker Commits Cardinal Sin

(Manny Was No Saint Either)

 

And Then Lyon's Den Turns to Pig Pen

Little: Margin for Error

Seanez in too long, Embree not in long enough

It's '46 and '67 all over again, St. Louis 9 Boston 7

The Red Sox new pitching coach made his first trip to the mound with two outs in the fifth inning. Don't know what he said to B.K. or if Kim understood
it, but J.D. Drew promptly hit a three-run home run. Nice.

Of course those runs will be earned even though any other second baseman in
the Majors would have gotten an out on Cairo's weak ground ball that should
have ended the inning. How can a guy with no range be on his way to making 25 errors at second base? Todd Walker is incredible.

Rock Star Hits Rock Bottom: Damon down to .239 Never mind lead-off, Should he be in the line-up?


Thanks Dad, for the Tickets

And happy Father's Day. Sorry about the "same old #&%! Red Sox" outcome last night (let's just sweep it under the rug). Not Your Typical Media Guy:
Tom Caron, The Shining Star of NESN. They don't pay you enough TC :-). Yes, the camera does add 10 pounds, the other 20 are mine.


6.9.03

Mission Kimpossible

BK must face Woody Williams tonight. The Cardinal righthander is 8-1 on the season with a 1.99 ERA over 12 starts and is coming off his best outing of the year.

These Cards are Stacked
Sox Will Have Hands Full with Red Birds


Boston Back in the AL East Saddle

My Kind of Town, Chicago Is... 8-7 Cubs Beat Yanks


6.8.03

Millar Park
Kevin Hits Two More Out

Dogs Pound Brewers

Lowe and Behold, Mendoza Holds the Line, Derek Blistering Through Six,
Sox Win One the Easy Way, 9-1
(Grade E. Coyote: Genius)


Saturday June 7, 2003

DIRT DOGS SHOW LATE NIGHT BITE

Pedro Brings Out His Rally Honkys

Pen Stops the Bleeding,
Sox Win it in 9th 11-10

Dogs Have 9th Lives

Trot, Jason and The Comeback Kids Get Hot, Mueller Comes Through in a Pinch, Millar Parks Slam, Nixon Ties it Up, Tek Puts Sox On Top

"They kept grinding, and grinding and
good things happened." - Grady

(Manny and David Go Deep Early Too)


MASH Unit Update: Rotation Needs Triage STAT

DOWN GOES FOSSUM DOWN GOES FOSSUM

Casey Takes Pedro's Spot on the DL After First Inning Left Shoulder Injury. Expected to Be Out Through
All-Star Break.

Fossum: "I felt fine warming up, I threw one to Jenkins and I felt something, tried to get by the rest of the inning and then decided to just shut it down. I'm really concerned."

Who Will Shoulder the Starting Load Now?

Injury Puts Trade, Bronson on Front Burner,
Plus The Rupe was on Fire (until yesterday)


Funny Aside: Rocket's No Evil Empire Maker

Chicago is Not the 300-Windy City, It's The City of Big Losses

Patches Can't Catch His Breath After Bullpen Blows Big One

Acevedo No Ace, Lets Karros Cork One Out.
Wood You Believe It's Career Loss #155 for Roger?

Clemens Clan Limps Back to Bronx
Cubs Win 5-2 (Hee Sop Choi Will Be OK)


In Other News: Michael Smith Scraps Weekend Plans, Bravely Risks Life and Limb for Belmont Stakes Report Despite Risk of Being Trampled to Death By Six Stampeding Horses.


Eight Isn't Enough

Sosa Slapped on the Wrist for Kicking Fans in the Teeth

Cubs, MLB go into Sammy Spin Cycle Because Sosa Has Ratings Appeal


6.6.03

Hector Al Dente

Wake and Baked, Sox Cooked in Sixth,
Brewers Well Done

Sox Call 911 for Relief in
9-3 Loss to Milwaukee

What the Hector is Going on Around Here?
Dogs Drop 8 of 11, Bull&#%!pen in Critical Condition.


6.5.03

Ace a Disgrace

Sammy Shill Plays Race Card Again

Martinez Goes On 15-Minute Tirade on ESPN, Gammons, and Backs Canseco 100 percent

And It's Literally 'Turn Back the Clock Night' for The Dominican Diva as He Plays his Blame Game, Forgets American Fame. What a Shame. For Martinez Only: It Does Matter if You're Black or White

On Sosagate: Martinez goes after Gammons and calls ESPN "anti-Sosa" after Outside the Lines Doubleheader. (Ummm, did you see Gammons and Harold Reynolds make fools of themselves Tuesday night ballwashing Sammy senseless?) The Pete goes on "This wouldn't be as big a deal if a white player's bat was corked." (Pete Rose turning over on a shopping channel right now). "It would still be a big deal, but not as big, not like this."

MarTEAMez Still Focused on 2002 Cy. (Sigh.) He's got Dementia, Clemensia and Zito Envy. But He Just Can't Get It Up for as Many Starts
(That's What's Stopping You Slick)

Martinez remarks "If Roger Clemens would have had the year I had last year he would have won the Cy Young instead of that white guitar player." (Theo hides Stratocaster as we speak). Sorry my fragile friend the "Cry Young" chant has gotten Old.

Pedro Hosts His Annual Whine and Sleaze Party in Pittsburgh. Needs to Wash the
Soap Box Out of His Mouth

Pedro went on the Press Tour in Pittsburgh to get the word out: "I'm not defending Sammy because it's illegal, but I've never cheated and I've been robbed. We might be Latins and minorities, but we're not dumb." And cheaters... cheaters loving cheaters are the luckiest cheaters... "If I knew how to scuff a ball and nobody would find out, I would do it. Baseball is a tough game. I just don't know how to do it.'' So suddenly Paydro's all Talk, but now he's nearly a month out of Action. And he's still whining all the way to the bank in the Bad Old USA. I guess $17.5 million a year doesn't go a long way when you're constantly discriminated against in America right Mr. Media Manipulator? (How convenient he wants a mouthpiece and some Pedro Press now eh?) Bottom line: this is Deja vu Danny Almonte foot-in-mouth disease all over again). The boo birds are on the wire. Oh, and get well soon Pedro.


MATT WHITE NOW A MARINER

Misplaced Lefty Traded for Seattle Single A Outfielder Sheldon Fulse.


It's The Pitts

Burkett's Sloppy Start Sinks Sox, Then
It's Gasoline Alley All Over Again.

On "Turn Back the Clock Night" It
Sure Seemed Like Old Times as Ramiro Menbloza 'Nother One and Sox Throw Too Many Embrees on the Fire Late.

The Talkin' Man and Trot Kept Sox Alive

Pirates 5, Americans 4


Last Call for Burkett?

It could be soon be happy hour for The Nation as Sox sober up again and slip back to second.

John Almost Gone: "I felt like I was in Tribal Council all night, just trying to survive out there."

SoSH's dnramo: "Pitching Burkett is like sleeping with your brother's wife -- it can be good until you get caught, then it really sucks. Pitching Mendoza is like sleeping with your dad's wife."

Red Sox Fan: "If the Sox had saved money on office supplies
in 1919, we would have won this game."


6.4.03

Mueller's Time!

Today, Bill Mueller Qualifies for the AL Batting Title. He Leads The League at .371


Mission Kimpossible

Byung Man's Gamer


Win, Win Again
At First They Do Succeed

Lowe Road Gets Sox Back on Top

Derek Pitches In. Trot, Belli, Damon Deliver. Sox 8 Bucs 3


Sox Get Right On The Manny

The Buc Stops Here

And Manny Won't Stop Talking

Lucchino must have threatened to trade Ortiz

ProJo Notebook on The Talkin' Manny:  Red Sox are a "better team than last year. Everybody's together. I'm playing good defense and hitting good. I'm trying just to see the ball and hit it, (homers) come and go. Maybe on one week, I'll hit 10. Ramirez said he "liked" playing in Boston, where he's spent the last 2 1/2 seasons. "I'm playing left field for the Red Sox and making a lot of money," he said. "What's to be mad about?" He also gave his approval to the new Monster Seats. "I like it -- it's fun," Ramirez said. "(The fans are) always talking to me, saying, 'Hit one up here.' "

In other news, hell freezes over after snowball fight and flying pigs spotted over Boston. Upon hearing Manny speak, Big Dog collapses, rushed to St. Elizabeth's, Red Sox medical staff intervene, "don't worry, we'll give him 'the proper treatment.'"  (Right... see treatment for: McMurphy, Randle. "One Flew over the Cuckoo's Nest")  "McMurphy is restrained and led away. Rumors spread that he has escaped, or that he has been brought upstairs and is "as meek as a lamb." In the middle of the night, McMurphy is returned to the ward - lobotomized, glassy-eyed, catatonic, totally passive, and obediently captive."

Game One: Boston 11, Pittsburgh 4

Tek, Trot, Walker, and The Talker Go Deep


6.3.03

CORK SCREWS SAMMY

SAY IT AIN'T SOSA

Scammy Sosa Caught with Corked Bat. Headed to Hall of Shame.

Can We Get Some for Manny?!?
A Major League Black Eye on Baseball. All Home Run Records Now a Sham.

Apologists Gammons, Reynolds Shameful.

Lucchino Says Sammy's a Liar.


HO-HUM, PEDRO PUSHED BACK AGAIN

(Now "Scheduled" To Start On Tuesday Against Cards at Fenway. And We'll Believe It When We See It)

The Truth Finally Comes Out, And Pedro Finally Speaks Up

"It's actually better. But you don't want to get it worse just because you want to rush. Maybe Grady doesn't feel there's a rush right now, and I agree with him. There's no need to rush at this point... especially knowing I have an opportunity to come back and be healthy the whole year and really push this team. I didn't know I got hurt so bad, and not be able to go back in two days or so. It was worse than I thought. I didn't know the lat was so influential. But it's getting better, a lot better.''


Jeter Named 11th Yankee Captain

"If you ask every person that ever played baseball, they would love to be a team captain, but that's something that's entirely up to him."

While Red Sox Remain Leaderless

A former Red Sox player last week said "this is Nomar's team for the taking, it's his city for the taking... he doesn't want it."

Nomar in September 2002:  Are you a leader?  "I... uh...I... I don't know... well um... how my teammates perceive me... uh... Wakefield and I have been there the longest, say things when they need to be said... I'm not going to change myself or my character, they'd be laughing at me, whatever, every time that comes up they say we need a leader. Do I need a leader? Do I need someone to follow? If you need someone to follow now, you've got problems."


It's The Pitts: Sox Rained Out

But Happy Days are Here Again


6.2.03

A Message to Michael:

Resign Today You Shameful Fraud

(OK, He Should Only Get Suspended, Lobel Gave Us a Mulligan)

Gutless Globe "Reporter" Skips Out of Toronto Trip

Press Box Colleague: "It's Unbelievable"

A Healthy 23-Year-Old Man Has A Better Chance of Getting Struck by Lightning in a Rubber Room than Getting SARS in a SkyDome Pressbox.

Smith uncomfortably fesses up about not "taking a trip to write sidebars in Toronto" then pulls a Shaughnessy on The Zone:  "I've never had a situation where I was asked to go to a city that has been put on the World, I think is it the World Health Organizations? (yep) list, and they recommended against unnecessary travel, they advised against unnecessary travel to Toronto. Major league baseball players voiced concerned about it... it is true, I asked not to go, it's 100% true. ...I mean, you know, I would offer anybody who thinks that they can do my job, or that wants to do my job, Don Skwar takes applications, I've seen a lot of resumes on his desk and you wanna be me, I wear a size 13, hope you can fit my shoes, you know. I mean just like any other choice that you may make... nobody else has to live your life for you."

SoSH's Sean Berry: "I guess no one in Canada should go to work based on the "I fear for my life" theory. Lazy people pretending to be cowards. Sad."

Besides, if you're one of the three people that listens to the ZZZone, what Michael Smith, Michael Holley, and Kevin Dupont know about baseball, you could store on the head of a pin.


6.1.03

Shea-hole Speaks Up,

Roid Boy Annoyed

Takes Shots at Theo, Teammates, Parking, Park, Boston, and Reporters Once He Lands Out West

Gerry Callahan Finally Exposes Hulkenbrand:

6.3.03: "Maybe someone should remind Hillenbrand that the guys on the Red Sox beat were decent enough not to ask him how he managed to build muscles on top of his muscles. Let's hope the D'backs provide him with a helmet that fits. He could use one."

And Now Shea Has Gays Up in Arms


SWEPT AWAY

THE WHEELS HAVE OFFICIALLY COME OFF

And the Finger Pointing Has Begun

Five straight losses. Grady sticks it to Theo by putting
Door Matt White out there to get clobbered by right-handers with the game on the line. Of course there's not a pitcher on the staff that can get anybody out anyway. Tek can't hit in the clutch. And Lazy Manny the lackadaisical left-fielder loafs after balls again.

But planning for the draft is going well.

Toronto 11 Boston 8


Grady Needs to Go

The team takes on the personality of its manager. Period. John Henry wanted Grady gone after last season but was overruled. Make the move now John.
Is Dick Williams available? Walpole Joe Morgan? Paul O'Neill even?


Wake Takes Offense at Defense

"I didn't feel like I was having problems at all... When you give them more than three outs an inning, bad things are going to happen."

Matt White Makes Excuses

"Well if that ball gets caught in left field, by Catalanotto, it's not as ugly as it looks. Next thing you know it's one run instead of three and our team's still right into it. We're a good hitting team so if I could have gotten out of that right there things could have been a lot different."

Jim Rice Throws Manny Under the Bus

Jim Ed thinks Manny plays field of screams, needs to get to more balls.


Detroit Breakdown,
Motor City Shakedown

Roger Denied 300 Again, Yankees Cough One Up for Clemens

From SoSH: Maybe Roger wants to do it against Boston in July after all. Can you imagine? His posse would be down to a handful of Clemenses. His wife would be considering divorce. His mother would be in a coma. Hurst, Barrett, and Geddy wouldn't be taking his phone calls. His "300 Wins" glove would be scuffed beyond recognition from being inspected and rejected by every umpire in major league baseball.

And the Sox-Yanks would be battling to stay out of the AL East basement.



Wild Card Wannabees

AL Wild

W

L

GB

Oakland

46

36

---

Boston

45

37

1.0

Anaheim

44

39

2.5

Chicago

42

38

3.0

Tampa Bay

42

41

4.5

AL East

W

L

GB

New York

51

31

---

Boston

45

37

6.0

Tampa Bay

42

41

9.5

Toronto

38

46

14.0

Baltimore

36

45

15.0


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The “Curt’s Pitch for ALS” program is a joint effort by Curt and Shonda Schilling, and The ALS Association Mass Chapter to strike out Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis, more commonly known as Lou Gehrig’s Disease.

Curt and Shonda will be contributing $25,000 to The ALS Association Massachusetts Chapter, and they are asking fans to contribute as well. All proceeds will benefit research and patient services for those in Massachusetts affected by the disease. Program participants will receive different incentive prizes based on the dollar amount per strikeout that they pledge. Please click here to learn more about the program.

Schilling is Top Good Guy


The SHADE Foundation

The Curt and Shonda Schilling Melanoma Foundation of America welcomes Red Sox Nation to join in their fight to save future generations from melanoma, a potentially preventable skin cancer.


Get a Danny O Fenway Litho, as Seen in the Cooperstown Catalog


Chasing Steinbrenner

Exclusive excerpts on the Kevin Millar signing


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